Denial - The Waiting Room

We lived in our house for many years. Like everything in life, there was some good and some bad. I guess the test is does the good outweigh the bad? Does the good make all the bad worth it? I have one word for you here:

Denial

Denial is quite the amazing thing. I think there are uses for denial, because I believe at this stage we are getting ready to act to do something. At the denial stage we have not let our consciousness know what is exactly up, as there is FEAR of repercussions. There is FEAR that something has got to change. Something needs to be different. Difference and change can be very scary things, and sometimes our subconscious self knows that we are not quite ready do deal with these… and we stay in that denial place until we are ready to do the work. Until we are stronger and fortified enough to plough through whatever we need to, to come out the other end of the change that needs to happen.

I believe our Authentic selves each owns a map and compass to our lives. The trick is being in tuned with her to read them. The denial stage is like a BIG waiting room, and we can sit around and read many good books, and meet interesting peoples here, but we have work to do, and it doesn’t get done in the waiting room. Your Authentic Self knows there is work to do, she even knows what you are supposed to do, and how you are supposed to do it!! They key is to be open to listening. And this isn’t always easy!

Life With a Moron

Life with a Moron is very unpredictable. And that’s how they like it. It’s easier to keep those around you in control, when they are walking around on eggshells and easy to knock over. When you do not know what to expect, but at the back of your mind are expecting the worst, the focus is off if this type of behaviour should even be tolerated, and instead focused on what to do when…

This keeps the Moron’s victims always off kilter, while the whole time alluding to the ever popular, “it’s you, not me” feeling. Morons have a way of making you feel a little crazy. Of making you do a double take on your own thoughts, feelings and insights. Morons often utilize the help of your family and friends to bring these feelings home. They create situations with their incredible manipulative skills to appear to those closest to you, that you are in fact losing a bit of your mind, and reduce your credibility. This makes them second guess you, and most importantly, you second guess yourself. And there they are swooping in like a knight in shining armour to “save” you from yourself, and make you more dependant on them.

Morons prey on your weaknesses and chip away at your strengths in order to feel better about themselves, and ultimately have the feeling of power over you. In the beginning this can be confused with a “Knight in Shining Armour” persona. But it is in fact a very devious and underhanded way of gaining power and control over you.

Check out The Moron Code, for further Moron signs and insights. In my opinion, the most important one being: Actions speak louder than words.

Living a Moron-free existence now, I am able to reflect and assimilate knowledge. I am able to focus and learn how I allowed myself to be manipulated and contorted by my Moron. I am such a believer in knowledge and education being key. It is only with knowledge can we learn from our mistakes and perhaps even impart some of our wisdom to others to help navigate this wonderful life – in a hopefully Moron-free existence.

Roller Coaster Ride

Living with my Moron was like a roller coaster ride, although the price for the ride was high, at times it almost cost me my life.

In real life I have always preferred the old, rickety, wooden roller coaster rides. The ones that really rock you about, and twist and turn and shake you in your seat. In my private life I thought I wanted less drama than that. I was under the impression that I wanted my fairytale romance. Problem is, the romance that is shown to us from fairy tales, and Hollywood always seem to involve drama.

The BIG kiss, the fight that almost broke them apart, the huge misunderstanding as a result of the meddling best friend, the ultimate epic romance. These are the images and stories we are blasted with from the time of our conception, and they get linked into our psyche, and can be hard to interpret. Especially when you have a Moron taking you on a roller coaster ride with all the highs and lows, and drama you could imagine.

After all, aren't you supposed to stand by your man? Isn't your prince supposed to rescue you from the fiery dragons, and fight for you against all odds? Doesn't passion mean the explosion and fireworks and doesn't all of that equal love?

It has taken me 30 some odd years to figure out the true meaning of love, and that love exists also in the quiet times..."Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres" (Corinthians 13:4-8).

Perhaps the next time I will stick to the roller coaster rides at the amusement parks, and seek true partnership and love found in my much enlightened view of true love. How about you?